Entry: Freedom of Speech

(Ahem)

(clears his throat)

I would like to exercise my freedom of speech by talking about how much Microsft Word absolutely bytes. And I do mean BYTES!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously though...how much stuff does uncle Bill think that they need to cram into a single application?? I swear...they should rename it K.I.T.T (a reference from the old 'Knight Rider' show).

Here is an example dialogue between me and my application:

Me: Hey...I want to paste this picture in this spot just like I could do in Word 2000.
Word: Sorry. Those keystrokes and mouse movements have been depricated and have been replaced with a new process which takes twice the amount of time but is cool enough to add a TON of new features that you're never ever ever going to use.
Me: Let me re-phrase....I'm going to paste this picture here in this spot.
Word: I'm sorry Jason. I can't do that.
Me: Yes you can.
Word: No I can't.
Me: Yes....you CAN.
Word: No....I CAN'T.
Me: You really are a piece of junk, Word, did you know that?!
Word: No, I didn't. However, please feel free to peruse my all-encompassing MS Office help file. It really won't help you get anything done, but it will let you know what kind of processes I've automated (since uncle Bill knows MUCH better than you do how you should construct your documents).
Me: Junk. Reeeeeeal junk.
Word: Would you like me to automatically generate and send a trouble report to uncle Bill?
Me: Will he read it?
Word: Not likesly.
Me: Ok...just forget it. I'll skip the picture and just add these roman numerals in this spot instead.
Word: In that spot? I'm sorry Jason. I can't do that.
Me: SONOFA.......!!!!!!!!
Word: ( Squeal like a pig!!! BWAHAHAHAHAH )