I stole this from Nicole's blog. Hope she doesn't mind. :)What men REALLY think!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about your leaving it down.
3. Sunday sports...It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
4. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we will NEVER think of it that way.
5. Crying is blackmail.
6. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
- Subtle hints do not work!
- Strong hints do not work!
- Obvious hints do not work!
- Just say it!!!
8. Come to us with a problem ONLY if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
9. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissable in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
11. If you won't dress like a Victoria's Secret model, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
12. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
13. If something we said can be interpretted in two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
14. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
15. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions and neither do we.
16. All men see in 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, NOT a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
17. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
18. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing', we will act like nothing is wrong. We know you are lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
19. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
20. Whenever we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you decide to wear is fine....really!
21. Don't ask us what you're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball,
the shotgum formation, or golf.
22. You have enough clothes.
23. You have too many shoes.
24. I am in shape. Round IS a shape
25. Thank you for reading this. Yes...I know...I have to sleep on the couch tonight. But did you know that men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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